i got e-mail today from "kelly clarkson." she asked me if i was interested in something "hot, young, and tight" -- and i'm not talking about the performances on american idol's greatest moments. i wasn't, really, but since she offered...

i'm trying to get my head around this. (oh God.) it certainly doesn't take long, does it, before one's identity is co-opted by the spammers of the world, but what are they trying to accomplish? do they think that the average e-mail reader has stars in their eyes, that they're saying to themselves, "well, i can't delete this, it's from kelly. i mean, perhaps stardom isn't all it's cracked up to be and she finds the world of internet porn far more fulfilling, not to mention lucrative"? sure, i read it, but that's my nature. obviously i know it's not from the real kelly. (obviously.)

now, on the other hand, if i receive e-mail from nikki...